As we all know, my exams are coming up soon. Or more like, it’s tomorrow. So I was revising Chemistry (I prefer to call it alchemy which sounds more magical, very much unlike the education system), and I wrote down the electrochemical series on my left arm because that helps me memorise things. I can be taking a dump and there it is, on my body, without having me worrying about getting poopy germs onto my notes and then pass it on to my teacher and then the whole student body and then have the whole school shut down by the health board. Which, on hindsight, doesn’t seem all that bad.
Anyway, after studying for the whole morning, I took my dog out for a walk and ran into that nice elderly man who was also walking his dog. After making some small talk he noticed the scribble on my arm. He was hard of hearing and sight due to his age, and he exclaimed in a very old-Chinese-man-way, “Wah, you have a tattoo ah!” I tried to explain the situation, but you’ve got to understand that some old people simply do not care if you’ve got logical substantiation behind your apparent illicit doings. So after many futile monosyllabic interjections of denial that I purposefully went out and illegally obtained body ink just to bring dishonour upon my family, the nice elderly man squints , made a brief compliment on my “tattoo” and hurried off, disrupting his pooch that was mid-way sniffing my dog’s crotch.
I hope he doesn’t bump into my parents anytime soon.
TL;DR: My terrible handwriting on my arm passed off as a tattoo and my dog’s horny